I arrive to the silence. I am hopeful to take this time to listen…to be…to know…if only for this moment.

I participate in morning prayer and these words speak to my heart (from the Beatification of Father Titus Brandsma (Carmelite, pg 46.))

Do as perfectly as you can the tasks of your every day life, even the most trivial.  It is quite simple.  Follow our Lord (Jesus) like a little child.  I skip after him as best I can.  I put my trust in him and abandon all care.

How do I trust God, and abandon my control, my desire?  How do I let go and allow God to lead?

I believe I have begun to learn this difficult task during this time of Covid-19.  Letting go of so many things, not by choice, but because health officials suggest it is the best route, the best routine, to social distance, stay at home and to “be”.

It is a blessed gift really, being ‘forced’ into being.  The choice taken out of my hands. A splendid surprise how accepting I am to this new routine.  No longer setting an alarm to wake myself but gradually waking to my own circadian rhythm. 

No longer being tethered to a clock but responding to the many gifts that present themselves throughout the day.  Responding from the center of my being.  My impulse of heart moving me.  Being present to what is given instead of looking for something more, something in the future which is still out of reach.

I believe Thomas Merton would call this living contemplatively.  He writes in Bridges to Contemplative Living with Thomas Merton: Finding Our Identity in God (2006, pg 14)

Contemplative Living involves this inner work of attention and presence to each person and situation we encounter in our daily lives. Each person and each moment of our day is a ‘Word’ of God for us.

In the moment I can truly appreciate all I need, God has already provided, continues to provide.

I am in awe of this precious, blessed gift that is given so unexpectedly, that I am awake enough to notice!  Praying this moment will transform me, turning what was once spark into fire.  Fanning the flames of God’s infinite love to another.  Waiting for a new day to begin.

– Tammy K. Barthels